When people hear the phrase “estate planning,” many immediately tune out. They may think, “That’s only for wealthy people,” “My family already knows what I want,” or “I don’t want to think about dying.” The most common myth I encounter is that estate planning is only for people with significant assets. In reality, estate planning is important for nearly everyone—single or married, with children or without, with a large estate or a modest one. At its heart, estate planning is about making sure the people who care about you know how to help when it matters most.
This blog isn’t intended to be an “Estate Planning 101” list of things you should and should not do. I’m writing this to help you to think outside of the estate-planning box. It is not only about what happens after you pass away. It is also about what happens during the time when you may need help managing life’s daily responsibilities before you shrug off that mortal coil. Very few people know exactly how the end of life will unfold. Some people die suddenly, but many others experience illness, decline, or a gradual transition that requires support along the way.
Why does that matter? Because a thoughtful estate plan can identify who is authorized to step in if you cannot act for yourself. Who can pay your bills? Who can speak with your doctors? Who can make health care decisions if you are unable to communicate? Do they understand your wishes? Here’s an outside-of-the-box thought for some of us: if you are the primary caregiver for a beloved pet, who will care for that pet if you are temporarily or permanently unable to do so?
Estate planning is not only about what happens when you die. It is also about creating peace of mind when you cannot manage the daily details of your life. This can be especially important for people who are single, unmarried, widowed, or without immediate family nearby. The thought of asking someone else to take on these responsibilities can feel overwhelming, so many people avoid planning altogether. Unfortunately, when no plan exists, friends and loved ones may be left scrambling—trying to arrange care, pay bills, feed pets, contact attorneys, or make difficult decisions in the middle of a crisis.
If you are in the hospital facing a serious health issue, your focus should be on healing—not daily financial details or whether your loved ones know your wishes. An estate plan gives the people you trust a clear path to follow. It reduces confusion, minimizes conflict, and allows them to help with confidence because you made thoughtful decisions before a crisis was at the door.
Estate planning is a gift.
Through a power of attorney, you can authorize someone to handle financial matters if you are unable to do so. Through a health care directive, you can share your wishes for medical care. Through a health care power of attorney or similar document, you can name the person you trust to make medical decisions on your behalf. For unmarried couples, single people, and anyone whose closest support system may not be a legal spouse or immediate relative, these documents can be especially important.
If you think you are too young to need these documents, consider how often life changes without warning. I often think of a dear friend who was only a few years into marriage with the woman he loved deeply. After the heartbreak of a miscarriage, they learned she was pregnant again—this time with twins. Their joy quickly turned to grief. They lost one twin, and then he lost both his wife and their remaining child to an unforeseen medical condition.
As he was trying to absorb an unimaginable loss, he was also faced with an exhausting list of financial and practical decisions. The mortgage was still in her name. Some credit cards had not been updated after the marriage. There was no life insurance to help cover medical or funeral expenses. When her parents generously offered to pay for the funeral, he found himself pulled into arrangements while still reeling from the loss of his entire young family. Estate planning documents would not have erased the financial hardship or the grief, but they could have eased some of the administrative burden and given him more space to focus on healing.
When clients tell me their children are getting married, I often share an admittedly unromantic truth: one of the most meaningful gifts a new couple can receive is a trip to meet with an estate planning attorney. It may not feel sentimental, but it can provide real peace of mind for a future no one can fully predict.
Thinking about estate planning is not always easy. It asks us to consider uncomfortable possibilities and to imagine moments when we may be vulnerable. But plans made during calm seasons can be a tremendous source of comfort during difficult ones. They are an act of care—for ourselves and for the people we love.
There are many other ways to think creatively and thoughtfully about estate planning. In a future conversation, we can explore additional “outside the box” considerations that may help you protect your peace of mind, your loved ones, and the life you have worked so hard to build.